I am sure that many of you diehard Dodger fans have been subjected to family members who turned to the Dark Side of Angel baseball after 2002, with chants that the Dodgers are going nowhere, and that the ownership is destroying the team.
In my case, the Anakin Skywalker is my brother Chris. Within the last few years, he went from bleeding heart Dodger fan (he left a trail of blue, as if he was a Dodger snail covered in blue ink, wherever he went)… to a guy who names himself DodgerRefugee on the baseballgeeks.com website two years ago.
And, after a record Dodger win streak, he all of the sudden wants back…
So, I created a set of rules, which I am conveying to you baseballgeeks listeners and readers who may be in the same situation.
Here is today’s email exchange:
From: Chris Reed
Subject: GO DODGERS!
17 of 18…… Best winning stretch since 1899 when they were the Brooklyn Bridegrooms….
Re: GO DODGERS
I have told you already how you get back into the Dodger fold.
You have consistently refused after my numerous attempts to sway you from the dark side.
So, when you gave inklings of wanting to come back earlier in the year
when the Dodgers were winning (no surprise you weren’t trying to get
back in the fold when they lost 12 of 13 after the allstar break), I
gave you this formula:
1) Dodgers have to win a World Series;
2) You cannot watch any Dodger World Series or Playoff games and most
certainly cannot attend any (51s are acceptable, or any Dodger farm
team that is not named the Dodgers);
3) You cannot wear ANY Dodger paraphenelia (a 51s hat/jersey is
acceptable) until a World Series win — not a game but the SERIES win;
4) The above rules do not apply to any of your progeny until they turn
18 as diehard Angel fans (The D Brothers can wear any Dodger
paraphenlia provided they give an oath that the "Angels [suhck]" — Daniel
is exempt until he can speak, although as he is learning to speak, I
will accept "Dah-dah [suhcks]");
This could be decades, you realize. Potentially centuries. All rules apply in heaven.
So, I present to you a shorter option (and this is new to the formula):
1) you have to wear a specially made (and obvious) t-shirt (with no
coverings or jackets) to a Dodger regular season game that says "I am a
Bandwagonner" on the front and "Angels [suhck]" on the back. This
one act will give you a free pass back in. This act will need to
be performed TWICE if at a 51s game (and photos must be taken with fans
around you while in the crowd).
May the Baseball Gods strike you down should you violate any of the above rules!